another episode with kuan yin

Tink · 12-08-2008, 11:48 PM

thank you. it just bothers me this started before i added to my household. it wasn't the sole reason but something that crossed my mind, when i got baby bear (the first ferret), that "at least i'll stop being so heartbroken about kuan yin and might have someone who wants my attention". i really wish i could say it was just the other additions. but i didn't bring them in till after me and her had this seperation.
yes i suppose she's a teenager. she doesn't go outside at all but there are lots of critters in tanks and cages around here that she likes to keep track of. i think she thinks they are her pets..LOL.
anyway, i'll love her forever whether she wants to be around me or not. she sure loves her dad though. she'll follow him around the house after he gets home. guess some boring mom who is always home b/c she's on disability gets old. oh, well.

meep · 13-08-2008, 09:24 AM

Tink, you do seem very wound up by this whole situation, it is such a shame

But I think cats are very sensitive to energy and emotions and even if you act happy and playful with Kuan Yin she may pick up on your resentment towards her lack of affection?

I would suggest maybe chilling out a wee bit towards her, still being loving etc. but not concentrating so much on all you've mentioned in your post. Just don't think about it, try not to get emotionally engaged and it might 'clear the air' a bit. It seems, in your heart, you're putting a lot of presure on Kuan Yin to be as she was as a loving little kitten, and she may pick up on this pressure?

I dont at all mean that to sound harsh or accusational - it's so hard to convey these things by text online! Really don't try to take it personally though. If I'm ever first home and my OH is out for another few hours they'll quit eoften meow and scratch at the door and ignore me. Cats do these things and we can't really understand why.

angieh · 13-08-2008, 10:16 AM

meep has put this so well Tink - I know it's very hard but just try to stand back a bit. (((HUGS)))

Tink · 13-08-2008, 11:20 AM

i have, not being defensive but i have. i haven't thought about the affection thing much..i think this recent "attack episode" just brought it all up again and made the wound a bit fresh again. i try to concentrate on all my other "kids". tigger and cuddles are 17 and deserve all the love they can get and hestia is so new she needs lots of reassurance. plus, you can't forget them ferrets..anytime i feel sad they immediately throw themselves around and perform antics to make me laugh almost on cue.
i was probably having a hormonal moment (finally getting it checked after numerous hysterical phone messages i left saying it couldn't be ignored any longer..LOL) so that probably doesn't help.
thanx for setting me back on track. you're right.
new game plan: focus on the other kids, still let kuan yin know she's loved without exactly being attentive (tricky..), and just focus on the thought when it comes up that she'll come around one day.

meep · 13-08-2008, 01:34 PM

Don't worry Tink, we all need to rant and vent sometimes. Hopefully you'll feel better soon

And it's lovely to hear about your other pets, both cats and ferrets! The ferrets sound so cute!

angieh · 13-08-2008, 02:10 PM

Take care of yourself Tink - you know we're all here when you need us.

dandysmom · 13-08-2008, 04:13 PM

This is a good safe place to vent when you feel the need, Tink! We all need to do it sometimes, and you know we'll listen and we care...(ooh, sounding a bit soppy, but you know what I mean...)

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