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9.You can duplicate the warmth of a down-filled bedroll by climbing into a plastic garbage bag with several geese. |
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10.The canoe paddle, a simple device used to propel a boat, should never be confused with a gnu paddle, a similar device used by Tibetan veterinarians |
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11.When camping, always wear a long-sleeved shirt. It gives you something to wipe your nose on. |
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12.Take this simple test to see if you qualify for solo camping: Shine a flashlight into one ear. If the beam shines out the other ear, do not go into the woods alone. |
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13.A two-man pup tent does not include two men or a pup. |
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14.A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent hockey puck. |
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15.In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband of your underwear. |
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16.The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes excellent kindling. |
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17.The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle. |
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18.It's entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding mountain road behind a large motor home. |
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