When I am an Old Cat

[Mags]

When I am an Old Cat I shall wear a diamond collar and leave my footprints on white couches;

I shall drink my cream with a touch of brandy and spit out my vitamins;

I shall sit on the laps of dog people just to irritate them;

I shall nap on the top of the neighbour's petunias and perch on top of birdbaths and grow charmingly chubby;

But for now I must tolerate the dog
and use my litter box
and not sharpen my claws on the sofa, so no one can doubt the truth that cats are superior to dogs.

But every once in a while I wonder if I should be naughty now and then and nip a few toes, so my humans won't be too shocked when suddenly I become an Old Cat and start to wear a diamond collar.

Author Unknown

[angieh]

Isn't that charming? A bit of a parody on what I call the Purple Sausages poem.

[dandysmom]

I love that, Mags!

What's the Purple Sausages poem, don't know that one.

[angieh]

Oh sure you do Eileen! I can't remember the proper title - I'll see if I can find it. Written by Jenny someone - I have a brain like a sieve!

Here it is - didn't take long to find. Searched on purple sausages!!!

Warning

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Jenny Joseph

[dandysmom]

Aaah, yes, I do know it, and love it! Thanks!

[calismum]

Great Mags - love it.

I too like the 'I shall wear purple' poem. Reading it again it worries me that I already do a few of these things!!!!

[angieh]

I would suspect it's nothing worse than the satin sandals, CM, so you don't need to worry ............... yet!

[calismum]

Originally Posted by angieh

I would suspect it's nothing worse than the satin sandals, CM, so you don't need to worry ............... yet!