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Catsey Veteran
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Cats owned: 2 moggie boys; 1 grey 1 red striped
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: SW England
Posts: 12,761
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Rules for kittens seeking new homes
- Sit in the middle of the floor where the potential buyers can see you and scratch yourself really hard, a little moaning noise along with the scratching works even better!
- Just sit and wink at people from a distance. The buyers generally don’t suspect a problem from that but it ensures that your breeder won’t let you out of her sight! Then return to normal the minute the front door closes after them ‘Just kidding mum!’
- Knock over something noisy and then limp around until guests leave.
- Go and find the spice cupboard and take a good long sniff – that should get you sneezing well.
- Climb on the most frightened-looking buyer and dig your claws into their lap and purr loudly!
- When the buyers sit down, run up the curtains and slide down very slowly making as much of a tearing noise as you can.
- Hiss at the buyer’s children if they come anywhere near you, especially the girls.
- If anyone picks you up, open your eyes really wide and go completely stiff!
- Stand in the middle of the floor and make horrible retching noises gradually moving towards the visitor’s feet!
- Jump in the toilet (make sure it is clean first) and get yourself wet. I know getting wet is horrible, but it should sort out the good buyers from the bad, the ones that laugh should be ok!
- If they are still interested in you run to the nearest litter-tray and dig like mad spreading the entire contents all over the floor, then, come out of the tray with something still attached to your rear end and jump onto the nearest lap. That’s really effective! If the litter-tray trick doesn’t put them off, you’ve probably got to believe that the buyers are the best and you will be able to train them quite well!!
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