For Dandysmom- see it's not just you!

[cats' staff]

I'm sure you've seen this as it has been doing the rounds for years but it still makes me laugh.....

I didn't write this - wish I did! And I really wish I knew who to give credit too! Enjoy, anyway!


How To Pill a Cat



Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on each side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat gently in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, pick up and throw soggy pill away.

Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for count of ten.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse in from garden.

Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into cat's mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill out of foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep up shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set on one side for gluing later.

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with a pencil and blow into drinking straw.

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

Retrieve cat from neighbor’s shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door just enough so that head is showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with plastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Throw t-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

Call fire department to retrieve cat from tree across road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

Tie cat's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table. Find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by a large piece of fillet steak. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.

Get spouse to drive you to emergency room. Sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearms and removes pill from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home and order new dining table.

Arrange for ASPCA to collect cat and contact local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.

[lynz85]

it is incredibly hard to pill a cat with 2 people nevermind one!! i find wrapping a towel round the front so the front paws cant escape then massaging the throat until they swallow it the best way, but even then this is only 5% gauranteed to work

[dandysmom]

5%?? You have a better success rate than I have ever had! It is completely impossible for one wimpy little old lady to pill a large determined strong cat with great Won't! power.

Thanks, CS, it's always reassuring to read that I am not alone!

[truthisouthere]

Yes, it's for us all! Very funny.

I have found the key factors to successful pilling is to pick a moment when your cat is least likely to scurry off, eg, jst after she has approached her food or water bowl, or shortly after waking ( I said 'after'!) approach with the pill and syringe full of water and gently massage her awake then after a few minutes gently tilt the head back and at the same time pop the pill near the back of the throat with finger of the other hand, before your cat gets a chance to secretly and deftly spit it out (and this can happen frequently!) drizzle a little water at the side of the mouth or the front if she is amenable to lap, this really helps things go down and ensures your cat will almost always swallow. Gently massage the throat while doing this.

I have found this method the fastest and most reliable and when done like this it has the lowest 'spit out and gets fuzzy and then gets even harder to do because your cat has sussed what you are doing by now and has by this time run away, far away' rate.

[CathyW]

when i was having probs with ronnie and his pills, i ground the pill down and mixed it with SALMON !!! he loved his little treat twice a day. reggie was quite upset untill he had his squirty cream. them 2 are soooo spoilt.

[Squirrel]

Not the first time I've seen that one RCR, but well worth a second read...

I was amazed at how easily Cloud took her tablet from me the one time I did it. But then, she's very good for Mum, so maybe that makes a difference... Certainly didn't find any evidence of her spitting it up anywhere...

[Velvet]

I always found Pate good for dogs & i know Tim likes it - dread thoughts of having to pill any of the cats

[pamela81]

When we were given tablets to give Harris, we were dreading giving them to him as we couldnt get him to take a worming ablet previously, the antibiotic tablet came in 2 parts this time so we broke 1 of his treats in 2 that had a soft centre and pushed the treat into it and unbelievably, he ate it everytime!!

[angieh]

I admit to having tried using those syringe-like pill givers that I bought from the vet, but I was more afraid of hurting Pip (it was when he had to have 3 different meds, one of which was 3 times per day) and found fingers much easier but I did have OH holding onto Pip. I could tell when Pip was feeling better because he resisted more and more, but he did actually take all his meds in the end!