A couple was dressed and ready to go out for the evening.
They turned on a night light, turned on the phone answering
machine, covered their pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.
They phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived
and the couple opened the front door to leave their house.
The cat they had put out into the yard scoots back into the house.
They don't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat
the bird. The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes inside to
get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, the man in hot pursuit.
Waiting in the cab, the wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will
be empty for the night. She explains to the driver that her husband will be
out soon. "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab."Sorry I took so long",
he says as they drive away. "Stupid b*tch was hiding under the bed. Had to
poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!
She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck. Then I had to wrap her
in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her
fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!"
The cabdriver hit a parked car...