Advertise.

[Kazz]

Thats excellent Snoof. Really good. I'd be there like a shot.

[Mags]

Immediate vacancy in a loving home.

Warm lap is always available. Humans will always let you sleep anywhere.....but male human is fussy who sleeps in his chair!

The food is very good, if you don't fancy something one day they always try to tempt you with something else. Cat biscuits are always available together with fresh water.

There are warm comfy beds with duvets that you can snuggle right into, and in winter time you are even allowed to snuggle into the human.

You will have your own door to access the outside world where there are plenty of places to sunbathe and lots of flying insects to watch. Outside the garden there are plenty of trees for you to climb and go bird watching.......but the humans don't like you scaring the birds.

There is currently one middle aged tortie female residing there. She is very timid but I'm sure, with a lot of patience, you will become a great friend to her.
.
The vacancy is for life.......and all applicants will be vetted.

[Kazz]

Thats excellent Mags, I love the vetted bit

[smudgley]

Vacancy

The cat mad smudgleys have a vacancy for another feline in their house.
There's a big brown dog who you can get really close to & there are lots of cats that live in pens - great for running past & teasing, just to show them all that you are free & they aren't.
Early risers only need apply they get up at 5.30am most days - although they quite enjoy us cats waking them up at 3am.
At the side of the property is a nice flower bed - really handy for doing a poo in & then it's nice to cover it up & get your feet all dirty & then snooze on the cream coloured human beds.
There are chickens which are great for chasing & under the chickens pen, you can usualy find a mouse or 2. Mrs S loves it when you bring her one, she gets all excited & silly & jumps on the bed with excitement. Her eyes go all big & wide & she shouts Mr S in a very loud voice, so that he can see too.
Food is plentyful & good quality.
There's a large garden to roam in.
Currently builders are laying concrete stuff everywhere, great for dancing in & leaving pretty paw-prints.
Holidays are plentiful, they have a house on wheels & they take all pet cats in it with them.
No main roads so quite safe. In fact cats own all rights to our road & cars will slow down when we stroll across.
There are 2 little people who are loud but no trouble.
Genuine enquiries only please & no canvassers!..

[Snoof]

Originally Posted by Kazz

Thats excellent Snoof. Really good. I'd be there like a shot.

You're just in it for the bellyrubs

Great work everyone, I'm loving these

[Kazz]

They are great aren't they I am loving them too.

[Fran]

Originally Posted by Kazz

So come on then Fran how would Lucky advertise you to potential kittens?

Unlimited places available at kitty holiday paradise. Mrs human's moto - You can never have enough cats! I don't think Mr human shares the same view Fussy eaters very welcome...if you don't eat the food you will be guarenteed a different variety the next day If fresh food appeals...no need to waste valuable sleeping time finding your own as Mrs human frequently serves up tasty raw delicacies. If sight seeing interests you then the garden offers many interesting sites and smells to investigate although you are expected to be in by dark. There are plenty of well established trees for you to climb and worry the life out of Mrs Human who will get Mr human to rescue you should you become stuck! No need to worry about sleeping arrangements as if you are not happy with the other feline campers you will be given your own personal accomodation free from stress and warm and very comfortable. Mrs human does like you to talk to her on a regular basis although this is not compulsory. Amongst the campers are some large but very daft chocolate things who you will very quickly put under your paw and will even open a door for you if you are struggling. There are also some small humans who are extremely noisy but who are very kind and will let you snuggle under their duvets. 2 fluffy hopping things in the garden are ok as long as you do not make the mistake of entering their accomodation! All in all it is a lively hotel, but there is always entertainment and 24 hour room service

[Booktigger]

They are all wonderful - no idea what mine would say though.

[CJK]

goodness knows what mine would say

soemthing along lines of:

Vacancy arisen in total mad house owned by a completely loopy fruit cake, but with a good heart.

Allowed to sleep where you want, even in the beds.
fodo readilya vailable, as are hugs and (wehter you like it or not) kisses!!

fresh running water always ready.
Two small humans reside, theyre ok but watch the little one as he tries to share his soggy half sucked biscuits with you and then tries to eat your rather yummy cat food!

Tonnes of stuffed things about, i hear the humans call them teddies. I thought they were stuffed pets at first, but the humans like to cuddle them and i must admit theyre rather comfy to lay on.

Mother human is totally loopy, other cats living there are a mixed bunch, but all friendly

[Kazz]

They are all excellent come on Booktigger and the rest of you who have not yet taken the opportunity to advertise