I feel so helpless/angry!

moonstone · 14-06-2010, 09:44 PM

I am the first to admit that i do not like my sister-in-law (sil)much but over the years i have made a huge effort to put up with her nasty comments

(the usual one is calling me a "goldigger"something she calls everyone except herself

)she has 8 cats

I hate the way she treats them as she makes them stay outside in all weathers (I was last at her house at Christmas and the cats were out in the snow desperately trying to get inside)I kept asking her if i could let them in but she just says that "she doesn't want them hanging round her"

while there she asked me to look at her 18 year old female cats teeth as she was drooling

her teeth were fine so i told her she should get her checked up at her vets (I know the one she uses as i used to go there myself)anyway she waited until 4 weeks ago and finally took cat to the vets were it was found that cat had a malignant tumour on her tongue

vet said PTS but she took cat home and is leaving her to die in agony

my MIL keeps ringing me and saying that the cat must be in pain and that she won,t last long

I told my MIL that if she leaves this cat to die then she is being really cruel

I know SIL will do this as she did it with her last cat who was 19 and diagnosed with a tumour the size of an orange in her stomach

she took 3 weeks to die and MIL told me that she was crawling across the floor as she was unable to walk

SIL won,t use the vets as she doesn't like paying for anything and my MIL has to pay her vets bills

I have spoken to her vet and asked them to ring her to take cat in but they just told me to report her which i was going to do but now the family have clammed up and i don,t know if the cat is still alive

not sure what to do now as all i can think about is the pain and suffering this cat must be going through

I have told my O/H that i will not see this evil woman again

now she has gone and got another little ginger kitten

I really don,t know what to do about her

she is so CRUEL

any advice

Phoenix · 14-06-2010, 10:11 PM

I'm biased but I would report her to the RSPCA (they probably wouldn't do a lot though) and insist she gives up her kittens and cats, because if she's unwilling to pay the vets bills I'm sorry but she shouldn't have a cat

dandysmom · 14-06-2010, 10:41 PM

That is SICKENING! Can your MIL or OH not go and get the cat and take her to vets to be PTS? I cannot imagine the pain she must be in ......

Kim · 14-06-2010, 11:41 PM

That is so cruel. Why on earth does she have so many cats if she cannot afford them? leaving a cat to die like that is digusting. Someone must do something surely?

PoshPuss · 15-06-2010, 08:08 AM

I feel you must report her to the RSPCA, even if you feel that you are going to make trouble or that they won't bother, you must do some thing that helps that poor animal in distress. The onus is on the RSPCA to protect the cats and have a duty of care to act on a report of cruelty.

Your mother-in-law has been considerate enough in the past to help your sister-in-law with vet bills but really she must now act with you to stop this girl's insane neglect of her cats. Maybe, as a family, you could get together and see if she needs help, of a medical nature I mean, not financial.

yola · 15-06-2010, 10:03 AM

Could you get the support of the police over this? They might work with the RSPCA/other animal charity to see if the cats can be recovered from your SIL and treated/rehomed.

I feel very strongly that you should do something strong and positive; not always easy when family members are involved but you have to make a judgement over whether this is more important than the cats' welfare.

Much luck to you - it's a difficult position to be in.

trick · 15-06-2010, 04:02 PM

If you do phone the RSPCA try to have as much up to date facts as possible, like finding out when she was last a the vets from MIL of OH and if she is still alive and if on any meds (pain killers). The RSPCA will not go on old evidence, so try to give clear facts that they can not ignore.
good luck with this it always difficult when your let down by people who should know better.
H x

moonstone · 15-06-2010, 11:09 PM

Thank you for your replies

and i feel exactly the same as you she should be stopped from having cats/animals

I am really not bothered about causing upset in the family (although feel sorry for husband who will be caught in the middle)I feel guilty myself as this happend two weeks ago

my O/H visited his sister and she told him that the cat had stopped eating and she would take it the vets the following week to be PTS

then my MIL rang me saying that she would not have the cat PTS

I told her that i thought her daughter was really cruel and that she could NOT leave this cat to die like she did with the other one but i was told that daughter "knew what she was doing

)I waited a few days then spoke with MIL again offering to take the cat myself (as i did with the other one) AND TO PAY FOR IT TOO! This cat will NOT get Better it is a PTS situation

now none of the family will tell me anything so i don,t know if the cat is still alive or if she has died

I do not think that RSPCA will be able to do anything as the cat has been to the vet,s so has had some treatment

I feel this is my fault as i should have been more forceful with SIL but she is a nasty woman and i am a bit scared of her

she wouldn't have let me have the cat anyway

I am so worried that i can,t sleep over this but just being able to tell someone else (you guy,s) has made me feel some relief

If i ask my O/H whats happened to cat he just says that he dosn;t know

I may try ringing her vet again to see if she has taken the cat back again

then i will be able to do something for it

moonstone · 15-06-2010, 11:19 PM

I should add that this cat is my only priority

I do not want her to suffer as the other one did and if i can stop that then i will be very happy

her excuse for the first cat was that she was still eating but my MIL told me that she wasn't and was so thin

she keeps saying that this one will "not last much longer" (this was last week) and that she must be in pain

I was going to report her last week

i really wish i had done now

I will try to find out more tomorrow

trick · 15-06-2010, 11:19 PM

there is no harm in ringing the RSPCA, if the vet thinks you should then they might be able to advise her???

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